Hi Honey

I never talked anything like this while chatting on Yahoo messenger or anything. I don’t know why they did it to me. The ants. I was stunned to see my laptop under siege one fine morning. By an army of ants.

They were marching to and fro between the BACKSPACE and the war bunker they had set up under the loudspeaker cover. Is BACKSPACE the sweetest key on a laptop? Or the speaker? Did they find any sweet voice on the loudspeaker sometime yesterday? Or it was a pre-planned attack?

 

When it’s an army of ants; you are helpless. You can’t do anything. They would have stuffed the whole inside of your laptop with their food and other household material, sufficient enough to carry out months-long proxy-attack against you.

You can’t even apply chemical weapons against them. They will get the dose, but will run into the bunkers and die their silently. That means more JAMM inside. Still the first thought was to reach for the insecticide chalk I had long back purchased in India.

In India, they used to sell it under the brand name “Laxman Rekha”. If you don’t know what a Laxman is, it’s worth IMDBing. Laxman was a character played by i-don’t-know-who in the 1986 TV series in India. He used to draw lines on ground and those lines were difficult to cross by anyone. In fact, those lines were specially designed to stop bad beings. Because they showed good beings crossing those lines without any problem.

And even though you can also search for “Rekha” on IMDB, that’s not the Rekha I am talking about. This “Rekha” means “a line” in many Indian languages.

So the final product is supposed to enable you draw lines as Laxman used to do. But of course, of much lower intensity. Still high enough to stop the ants and insects. The good, the bad and the ugly … all o’ them. Discriminating good insects from bad ones would require higher level of AI programming, which, in order to keep the costs low, was not adopted by the manufacturers.

First thing I wanted to do with Laxman Rekha was to cut the supplies of the army. They can’t fight for long when their food and other supplies are cut. This is something I had learnt from the Srilankan Government of late. So be it. Let me show you the defeat of the military supplies at the Laxman Rekha. (FYI this was a vertical wall)

I was still careful not to let the ones die, who are still inside the laptop. A single deadbody in a strategically decided position can ruin the whole business of the laptop. So I refrained from it.

I started hitting the keyboard with an old toothbrush. Especially on the BACKSPACE and ENTER keys. And you won’t believe, I too couldn’t, the sound of it was exactly same as the box-beating sound you heard in O….. Saya….. from the Slumdogs. I am wondering what Rehman was chatting the day before…


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